Sweet Lies
by logie-girl
Summary: How can I believed that he loved me? No one can love me. That's what they always said. That's what everyone have said. Another death!fic. I'm not sure about the rating. But, just to be safe.


I tried to write another fic. And this fic is a little bit about me against the bullying. Hope you like it. And sorry for the grammar mistakes.

Disclaimer: I do not own Big Time Rush

**SWEET LIE**

My hand shaking as I unlocked the door, opened it. Once I was inside, I slid down the door. My body shaking so badly, my knees pressed up to my chest, my hands covered my face as sobs escaped my lips. Tears streaming down my face. I can't believe what I saw. No, not really. Deep down, I know something like this will happen sooner or later. The thing I can't believe is how naive I am, how can I believed that he loved me? No one can love me. That's what they always said. That's what everyone have said.

More sobs escaped me as the memory of what happened earlier flooded my mind.

*Flashback*

I looking for my boyfriend, James, on the studio where he's got a photo shoot schedule today. I looked around, a lot of people here and I don't see James anywhere.

"Logan!" I turned around and saw Jo, James's manajer, waved at me. I smiled and walked to her.

"Hey jo,"

"Hi Loges. What are you doing here? Looking for James?" She asked, smiling.

"Yeah, I want to have lunch together with him," I said, blushing a little.

"Oh, he just go get lunch. He said he go to you guys favorite restaurant. Maybe he's still on his way, he's gone not long ago."

"Oh, oke then. I just meet him there. So, he got another schedule after lunch?"

"Yeah, maybe he'll be free at 9 if everything go well. But tomorrow he just have one photo shoot in the morning, so he'll be free before noon I guess. Then..., you guys have so much time to.. you know...," she's smirked at me. I blushed at that.

"Oh, you mean more sexy time for you and Jett?" I shot back, smirking.

"Haha, so funny Logan,"she said, she's pouting and blushing. "But, yeah. We have plan tomorrow at noon, right after James finish. Just a simple date. He's so busy lately, it's so hard to spend time together with the new season of his drama and all.. you must be prepare too, you know. Because James's new movie will start shooting.."

"Next month, I know...," I sighed, "Okay then, I think I better get going now. Take care, bye." I kissed her cheek as I said bye.

"Bye! Tell Lucy and Steph I say hi!" I nodded and waved at her. Those are Kendall's and carlos's girlfriend.

I walked to the door but my bladder was full. So, I turned to the hallway that lead to the toilet. I heard people talking from inside the toilet, it's sounds like they're fighting, I could just turn around and go away if I really don't have to pee. I pushed the door open slowly so I don't get their attention.

I opened the door big enough to see what happen inside and my heart shattered. I saw James pinned against the wall, his hands pinned on either side of his head. I recognized the man who pinned James as one of his co-star from his last movie. I snapped out of it when a low growl came from James. I ran as fast as I can and as quiet as possible.

*End of Flashback*

I was kinda worried if James saw me, but I'm sure they too busy to noticed what was happening around them. Remembering that, a few tears escape my eyes again. And I still don't know how I can drive home when my body shaking so badly and my vision blurred with tears. I took a deep breath and tried to calm my self. I know that nobody could love me, so why am I so surprised?

I still remember the days I get bullied. They always beat me up and say that nobody could love me. I heard that everyday from everyone. And when my family had to move to LA cause my father's job, it didn't changed.

We move when I was on ninth grade. As soon as I step on that school, the bullies come after me. One day on my second week at that school, Kendall found me laying on the ground near the gym, covered by bloods. He quickly help me and called his friends, James and Carlos. That's when they offered me their friendship.

At first, I don't really believe them. Why somebody wanted to be my friends? I'm worthless right? Even my own parents barely talk to me, too busy with their job. But as the time goes on, I can see their sincerity. They seemed really care about me. So, I opened up myself and become a part of their little group. And that's when I let myself believe that somebody can care about me.

And after we become friends, the bullies never touched me again, well, at least not in front of my friends. I still get bullied once in a while, but not every hour like it used to be. And I didn't tell the guys because I didn't want to be a burden to my friends.

I can covered the little bullying from everybody for quite long time. The bullies are smarter then, they just gave me bruises on places I can easily covered by clothes. But one day on our senior year (I'm still get bullied on my senior year, yeah, go my life!) I'm on my way home from the library, the guys really want to come, but they get banned to go to the library for a week after causing a scene there last time they came.

So, on my way home, I met one of my lovely classmates, Josh and his friends. They were one of my constant bullies. And they feel so happy met me because they feel "bored" they said. Like always, they started beating me and say the normal lines everyone always said to me. But, when I tried to get up, one of them pushed me too hard and my head collided with the ground pretty hard. Blood started to flow, they get panicked and ran.

With dizzy head and blurry sight, I got up and started walking home, holding my bloody forehead. I didn't know how long I've been walking when I heard someone yelling out my name. I can't see who's calling me because it's so blurry and slightly black. Once the figure close enough, I realized that was James.

He quickly help me get to the hospital despite my protests. After I've been "fix", he come in to the room and stare at me with wet eyes. I'm so confused that time. Why he's crying? I asked that to him and he snapped, yelling at me why I don't tell him or Kendall and Carlos that I still get bullied. I panicked. How did he know that I'm still get bullied? I said to him that I was tripped. That's when I realized that I'm topless (the doctor told me to open my shirt because it have blood on it and he want to check for another damage) and James can saw all the bruises, new ones and old-still-healing ones (and I'm sure that the doctor already told him about the bruises).

I just looked down. He then grabbed my shoulder and forced me to look at him. When I saw all the tears and hurt on his beautiful eyes, I spilled all out. About how I still can't believe someone really care about me, cause I'm worthless, disgusting and I don't need to add burden to anybody, especially the one who nice to me. He quickly hugged me and told me that I mean so much to him. That I'm his bestfriend. That I was the most caring, selfless and nice person alive. I started crying then. That's when I realized I'm in love with one of my bestfriends.

After that day, the guys always stayed by my side. I'm gratefull by it but feel like I'm a big burden. And I tried so hard to keep my feelings for James at bay. I just have friends. I don't need to scare them away by told them I'm gay and in love with one of them.

Then, when we started college, I made another friend name Dak. He's a cool guy and so friendly. The guys like him too. One day, Dak and I were studying together in the living room on my shared apartement with the guys. We're alone because Kendall and Carlos have a double date and James had a class.

Dak started touching me in weird way, not like the friendly touch. I squirmed out of his touch but then he grab me and pinned me down. That's when I realized that Dak tried to rape me. I started yelling and strugling, but he punched me and covered my mouth. He already ripped my clothes off when I heard the door opened, and suddenly the body that pinned me down was gone.

I just watched when James punched him and throw him out off our apartement and yelled at him, too shocked to move. James quickly pulled me to his embrace. When the shock drained off, I started to cry. James whispered sweet nothings to me and rub my back soothingly.

When I've calmed down, I pulled away from the hug and looked up at James. That's when I realized how close I was from James. I stared at the beautiful hazel eyes that full of concern and he gave me a soft smile. My feelings for him that I always tried to forget but just bigger as the time goes on hit me with full force because of our closeness. Before I can think about it, I kissed him.

I realized what I'm doing and pulled away quickly. I stared at him with fear and shock, I quickly ran to my room but he caught me at the door. I panicked and start blabering about how sorry I am and I love him and begging him not to hate me. He silenced me by a kiss.

I froze and he pulled away, he smiled softly then tell me he love me too and he went to dates because he didn't think I'll return the feeling. And that's how our relathionship begin. Now we already have a job (him as an actor and me as a translator) and live together in a apartement close to Kendall's and Carlos's. And I always thought that we happy and love each other.

I let out a shaky laugh. How I can be so naive? How can I believe that James, or anybody, love me? How can I denied what everybody had told me for years? I must be crazy. I know that Kendall, Carlos and James is a good people. They must've been feel sorry for me so they made me their friend. I must know that James can't say no to me that night, not when I just get attacked by my so-called-friend. And he's too nice to break it up when I always happy and cling to him. Oh God! I can't believe how stupid I was.

I can't help but wonder how long he's been with somebody else? I remeber last month when he got super nice to me after he had a party and didn't come home till morning. Did he had sex with someone that he really love and felt guilty to me? Oh God... I can't believe I make him suffer! I'm so selfish!

I always understand why they always said I don't deserved to live. But now, I really get it. I make people suffer. Even the ones who nice to me. The one I love.

I wipe my eyes and make up my mind. I don't wanna cause another damage. I will end the suffering I cause. But, can I be selfish one last time? I want something before I go. I'm sorry God, but please, let me be selfish one last time.

...

"Baby, I'm home," I said loudly from the door. I saw him walking torwards me.

"Hey honey. How's work today?" He said as I peck him on the lips.

"It's exhausting but fun. Oh, and Jo said you came the set looking for me and wanted to catch me at the restaurant, but I didn't see you?"

"Oh. My office called and need me to be translator for the day cause Camille's sick today." He said, smiling.

"Hmm... I love it when you talk in another language. It's so hot," I said as I started to kiss his neck then make my way to his lips and kiss him.

When I pulled away, Logan's staring at me. I can see some emotions on his eyes but I don't know what it is. It seems like he's sad or something.

"Honey? What's wrong?" I watched him worriedly.

"Huh? Oh, nothing. Just... missed you," he said then hug me tightly. I can feel something is wrong. Did he know about...?

"Logan, baby, really, what's wrong?" I pulled away from the hug to look at him. He just smile and shook his head. His beautiful chocolate orbs stared at me lovingly and he kissed me softly but full of passion. I moaned to the kiss. When we pulled away, we both panting.

"James... Make love to me?" He asked me softly. I smiled and I pulled him to another passionate kiss. I carried him bridal style, walking to our bedroom, lips still moving against each other.

We both still try to catch our breath after our orgasm. I pulled the banket to covered our body. Logan snuggled to me. I smiled and pulled him closer, put my arms around him. I kissed his forehead and looked down at him. My eyes widen when I saw tears on his eyes.

"Honey, what's wrong? Did I hurt you?" I asked, panicked. I put my hands on his face, wiping his tears with my thumb.

"It's ok. Just hurt a little bit, sorry for being such a whiny," he said softly, looking up at me with soft smile.

"Oh, baby, I'm sorry," I said and kiss him softly. He smiled at me.

"It's ok. I love you James,"

"I love you too, Logie," He smiled when I said that. But, I get that look from earlier again. The one with that weird emotion. Before I can figured it out, he closed his eyes and snuggled to my chest. I hugged him and rubbed his back.

Hearing his soft breathing, I can't help for wandering to what happened today and what caused it. I feel guilt started to bubling on my chest. I can't believe Dustin came to see me today. I mean, what happened last month on that party was a mistake! We both drunk! And I tried my best to tell him that I love Logan and what happened between us was a mistake. But he keeps calling me.

And today! He came to the set and pulled me to the man's room. We started talking at first, then it turned to yelling. He told me he really likes me and what happened between us wasn't a mistakes. And suddenly, I being pinned to the wall. I growled and kicked him, then I quickly ran out before he can get up or anybody can see us.

I looked at Logan on my arms, he looks so peaceful. I smiled softly at the sight. His messy black hair, his flushed pale cheek, his plump lips, his pale skin. He looks like an angel, my angel. I'm so lucky to have him in my life. I'm so grateful when Kendall found him that day(but I didn't enjoy the fact that Kendall found him beaten), so we become friends and now, lover.

I'm gonna talk to Dustin tomorrow. I need to get this straight. I don't wanna risk losing Logan because of him. I kissed Logan's lips softly and close my eyes, letting myself drifting off to sleep.

I woke up and look down at the warm body in my arms. Logan's staring at me, he's smiled when I looked down. I smiled back to him and kiss his lips.

"Morning, baby," I greeted him softly.

"Morning," He said. I hugged him closer when my phone started buzzing. I reached up to it, still holding Logan close to me and groaned when it was Jo, telling me to get ready and come to the studio.

"Jo?"

"Yeah. I need to go to the studio," I said, pouting. Logan chuckled.

"Then get ready, big boy. I'm gonna make breakfeast," He said getting out of the bed.

After I'm done getting ready, we ate breakfeast together. After we done, I made my way to the front door. I turned around saw Logan stand behind me. He's zoning out.

"Logan?" I said as I snapped my fingers in front of his face.

"Ah. Huh?"

"I'm going now, baby," I said. He looked at me. That weird emotion come back to his eyes.

"Okey, bye. Be careful," He said and I leaned down and kissed him. When I pulled away, he hugged me close.

"Logan?" I asked as I rub his back.

"Sorry. It's nothing," he said as he pulled away. He looked up at me and smiled, "I love you." I smiled.

"I love you too," And he did that again. He gave me that look again. It's looks like... sadness and... something else I still can't figure out. I'm opened my mouth to say something but he pushed me to the door.

"Go. You don't want to be late, right?" I nodded and shot a nervous smile at him. I got some weird and bad feeling about this. But he's right. I'm gonna be late if I don't go right away. I'll just talk to him when I get home, after I talk to Dustin.

...

I put the note I wrote for him on the bedside table, then sit on our bed. I leaned against the headboard. Do I really want to do this? No, I don't, but I need to. ...Do I really need to? Absolutely. But James looked sincere when he said he love me..., right? Of course not, you idiot. Stop dreaming. You've heard everyone. You're worthless. You're disgusting. How could you believe that someone love you?

I took a deep breath. I must do this before he gets home. I can't postponed this any longer. I'm already did that last night, my last selfish act. And I remember how he said "I love you" to me last night and this morning. I smiled sadly knowing that he didn't really mean that.

I wanted to grab the razor but then I saw our picture and I grabbed the picture instead. It's the picture of James and me when we first moved together. I grazed my hands on his face, his perfect hair, his beautiful smile and his beautiful hazel eyes. I can't believe I made this beautiful person suffer for years, pretending to be in love with me.

I kissed the picture then put it down and glanced at the clock. My eyes widen when I saw the time. I quickly grabbed the razor. I need to do it fast before James get home. I draw lines on both of my arms then lay down on our bed. I closed my eyes and smiled, knowing that I do the right thing. I know that maybe I supposed to done this long ago, but at least I finally do this before it's too late.

I pulled the shirt I wear(it's baggy in my body because it's two size bigger) close to me and breathed in deeply, taking in the scent. I smiled when the familiar scent flooded my nostril and give the warm feeling to my chest. I curled up and keep breathing in the scent till I feel tired. I feel the darkness started claiming me when I heard my name being yelled.

...

I parked my car and sighed. It's still noon but I feel so tired. What happened so far was exhausting. Everything went so well with the photoshoot that we finished so much more early than planned. So, I met Dustin earlier than I planned too.

I can't believe he still tried to seduce me in the restaurant. It's so hard to tell him that I don't like him. It's felt like I'm talking to a toddler, and a stupid one at that. And I hope no paparazi back then. Because we kinda made a scene, and my jaw still throbbing because of him. But, at least I made it really clear that I had no feeling for him and he'll not gonna bother me again.

I sighed and get out from the car. I walked to the park in front of our (Logan & I) apartement building and sit on the bench. I leaned back and began thinking what the best way to tell Logan about all of this. I snapped out of my thought when my name being called by familiar voices.

" James!" Carlos yelled joyfully, his hand full of grocery bags.

"Hey dude!" Kendall grinned, and he got a lot of bags too.

I grinned back and they set their bags beside me on the bench.

"Hey! So, I was thinking that we all got super busy lately and I realized I miss my buddies! Then, I called Kendall, and know he's got a day off, so I asked him to join me crash your apartement to surprise you and Logan. Then we got all this snacks and beers and dvds and saw you sit here all alon—hey, it's that bruise in your jaw?" Carlos abruptly cut himself.

It takes me few seconds to process what he ranted. Kendall, who quickly catched what carlos ranted about, stared at me.

"Yeah, that's a bruise. Did you had a fight with Logan James? What happened?" Kendall said, his eyes darken. He's always been overprotective with Logan. I have no doubt that he will beat me if I tell him the truth. I sighed.

"No, this bruise's not from Logan... but maybe I'll get some from him," I said, looking down.

"What did you do, James?" the way he said that make me shiver. I totally end up in the hospital tonight.

"I cheated on him." I closed my eyes and waited for the hit to come.

"James," the fact that carlos was the one who speak made me look up. He's holding back Kendall, who struggling to get free.

"Tough you be my bestfriend first before Logan, I'll not hesitate to beat you if you're hurt him. But I wanna hear all of it first before I help Kendall send you to the hospital," Carlos said sternly. His usual happy-go-lucky self nowhere in sight.

I sighed. I already regret it deeply. But now, I can't be more dissapointed by myself. I really understand why they act like this. Like they want to murder me. Because we all know that Logan have a really serious self-estem issue he got from all the bullying. And me cheated on him...it's just the same with killing him.

"I'm sorry. I really am sorry. It was a mistake. I was drunk, and he was drunk too. I think we both know that what we done was a mistake. But no, he thinks I have feeling for him and he said he really like me. I ignored and avoided him, but he keep came looking for me. And yesterday he cornered me and kissed me. So, earlier today I met him. I told him I really not interested to him, ever. He got mad and punched me."

"Then I sit here to figured out how I'm gonna tell logan about this. I don't wanna him to know but he deserve to know. But I don't want to hurt him. He's gonna hate himself... He's gonna hate himself when the one he should hate is me...I'm a bad person. I can't believe I cheated on him. I really hate myself..," I covered up my face with my hands. A few tears escaped my eyes.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and I looked up with teary eyes. Carlos looked down at me with sad expresion. And I saw Kendall stared at me too. Kendall sighed.

"James.. you're not a bad person. Yes, you made a mistake. A really big mistake. But you seem to feel guilty about it. And based on what you said, you did it not because you wanted it. That means you still love Logan right?"

I looked at him like he's crazy. Of course I love logan. I love him so much. I told that to Kendall.

"Great. But still, you hurt him so bad, and we know about his issue. You really need to make a really good and clear point that you love him, James. Not anyone else," Kendall said.

"Okey then, buddy. I think we just gonna crash in my apartement. You need to clear this up with Logan and we don't wanna, you know, make things weird or something...," Carlos said and tap my shoulder.

"Wait! Don't go! What if Logan don't believe me when I say I love him? I need you guys there to help me! Please...," I looked at them pleadingly. I ussually can handle Logan issue myself, but this is really big. I don't know if I can get through him alone..

They glanced at each other then nodded. We grab the bags then made our way to my apartement. I get my key with my free hand and unlocked the door. I stepped inside and I put down the groceries, Kendall and Carlos right behind me. I glanced around. The apartement's so quiet.

"Logan?" I called out. No answer. I know he's not working today, so he's supposed to be home. Maybe he's go out for lunch.

"Maybe he's taking a nap?" Carlos suggested as he sit on the couch, followed by Kendall.

"Okey, I'll check the bedroom," I said as I made my way to our bedroom.

I opened the door slowly and gasped. He's curl up on our bed. In the pool of blood. So much blood. His eyes were closed and he looks so pale.

"LOGAN!" I ran to him. I gathered him on my arms when his eyes fluttered open. He looked up to me. He looked surprise.

"Ja..James..." He said in weak voice. So weak that it make me even more scared than before.

"Oh my god Logan! Why-Wha—You—Oh my god...!" Tears fall from my eyes and I'm sobbing now. Holding his small frame closer to me.

"James! Why were you-Oh my god Logan!" I heard Kendall from the bedroom's door. And I heard carlos gasped.

"Carlos! Get some towels! We need to stop the bleeding! Hurry!" Kendall said as he stumbled with his phone. I heard Kendall talked frantically to the phone, calling for help.

I just stared at logan. At his bloody hands. I'm still sobbing and tears streamed down my face. I hug him closer and kiss his forehead. I can hear his breathing. It's so slow and barely there. I pulled away and looked at his face. He's staring at me with half lidded eyes.

"Don't worry, honey. Help is coming," I wishpered to him as I kiss his lips. He pulled away from me a little and stared at me. He smiled softly at me then opened his mouth.

"I...I l-love you..," he said barely above a whisper. I bit my lips to hold back a sob and more tears spilled.

"I...*sobs*..I love you too, Logie..," He looked at me and his eyes glistening with unshed tears. He smiled softly at me and give me that look again. And it finally hit me. Hard. I understand now what that look means. He doesn't believe me. He doesn't believe what I said.

"Lo-,"

"T-thank...you..,J-james...," He smiled softly then his eyes flutered shut. A single tear escape his eyes.

"No...no...Logan...you got to stay awake, baby," I said as I shake his body gently,"Baby, come on...Logan please...please..," I pat his face and shake his body more, but he's still not responding. I shake his body harshly now as my own body shaking with hard sobs. I feel somebody gripped my shoulder. I ignored that and keep calling logan and shaking him.

"James..James..stop james..james..JAMES!" Kendall yanked me harshly so I looked up at him, still hugging logan close to me. He got tears streamed down his face. He shake his head. Sobs escaped my lips as I looked down at logan. I just realized that carlos sit beside me, pressing towel to logan's arms. Now he collapsed in logan's lap. His body shaking so hard and loud sobs coming from him.

I stared at Logan's face. I wiped the tears that escaped his eyes with my thumb, but it just make his face covered by more blood. His blood that covered my hand. I kiss him deeply, hoping him for returning the favor. But no, he didn't. I pulled away, his face wet because of my tears that trickled down to his face. 'Why? Why you killed yourself Logan? Why you didn't believe me when I said I love you?'

"James," Kendall said in hoarse voice,"I think this is for you," he handed me a note. I brushed my hand on my shirt to make it cleaner then I took the note. I glanced back to Kendall, he nodded. I took a deep, shuddering breath, clutching logan's still body closer with one arm then unfolded the note with the other.

**James, I'm sorry**

**I'm sorry about a lot of things. First, I'm sorry about the mess I made. I know maybe I should just do it in the bathroom, but I wanna die in a warm place. I wanna feel like I die in your warm arms. That's why I wear your shirt. **

I glanced down with blurry eyes and realized that yes, logan's wearing my shirt. Usually, I love it when he wore my shirt. Cause he'll looks really cute. But now, he just look so small. So vulnerable. And knowing the reason he wear it now just make me wanna cry harder. I bit back my sobs and continued reading.

**I'm sorry I ruined the shirt. But don't worry, I already bought you the same one yesterday.**

Yesterday? He already planned this since yesterday? I feel like I'm gonna faint, but I shooked my head and just keep reading.

**And I'm sorry about last night. Maybe you felt sick to did that with me. But I just wanted to feel it one last time james. I wanted to feel close to you. Warm and safe in your arms. Please, forgive me...**

**And the thing I really feel sorry for is the fact that I made you suffer for years. Years that you spent as my..lover. I still can't believe that you stick up with me all this years. I know now you can't said no to me that day. Not after I almost get raped. I feel stupid I'm not realized that right away and made you suffer so long.**

**I saw you yesterday james. Is he the one you truly love? Am I holding your back to get together with the one you truly love? I'm sorry! I'm so sorry! And this is the reason why I...go. I don't wanna hurt anyone else by my existence. I hurt the one I love the most! Who know what I can do to someone I hate..**

**So, goodbye James. Please tell my goodbye and my apologize to Kendall and Carlos, too. You guys are the most important aspect in my life.**

**And thank you, James. Thank you for all the things you give me. Thank you for saying I love you althought you didn't mean it. Thank you for all those sweet lies.**

**And once again, I'm sorry.**

**Goodbye,**

**Logan.**

I feel numb. My hand fall limply to the side. The note fall to the floor. I looked down at Logan. His pale face covered by his own blood from my hands. I slowly move my limp hand to rest at his cheek.

"Logan? Hey, wake up honey... I need to tell you something," I called out softly and give a little pat to his cheek.

"Baby? Wake up..I need to talk to you..I love you...I really do...That's not a lie. I never lie to you when I said I love you. I really, really love you, logie. Since the day I saw you. Baby? Please open your eyes. You hear me right? I need to tell you this when you're awake. Wake up please...," I said softly in small voice. But it sounded loud because the room's so quiet beside the sobs and sniffling.

I still called out to logan, patting his cheek, shaking his body gently when I feel hand on my shoulder, again.

"James...stop that james...he's not gonna wake up," Kendall said softly to me, his voice cracked a little.

"I need to get him to wake up, Kendall. He thinks I'm lying. I'm not. He needs to know that I'm telling the truth. I really love him. You know that right? Look logie. Even Kendall know that I love you. So wake up please... So I can tell you properly, honey," I still shaking his body gently, kissing both his lids.

I feel his grip tighten on my shoulder and broken sobs escaped him. And I realized carlos watched me with pained expression, tears falling down his cheeks. We heard sirene. Not long after that, paramedics barged in to the room.

Kendall yanked me backwards gently. I struggled in his grip. I yelled to the paramedics, who crowded at Logan, to be gentle with Logan cause he's sleeping. That's when Kendall slapped me hard on the face. I froze and Kendall gripped both of my shoulder, forced me to facing him.

"James! He's dead James! Logan's dead james..," He said brokenly. He ducked his head, his grip on my shoulder tighten, like that's the only thing that make him still standing. I stared at him. Then I stared at Carlos, who slid down to the floor beside us, sobbing loudly, his face covered by his hands. Then I stared at the paramedics. One of them shook his head, turned to his friend and said,

"Time of death, 1.33,"

And that's the exact same time when my heart died.

How's that? You like it? I think the plot is kinda messy. Sorry for that.

Review please?


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